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F1 Halloween Poem : Featuring Lewis Hamilton’s Dog Roscoe

by on October 31, 2013

It’s Hallow’s Eve in Formula One, one day before free practice is run and Vettel has no plans to be outdone or do a single doughnut..nope, not one!

In Abu Dhabi, there will be no trick or treating. The real trick this season has been surmising how to dish out a Red Bull type beating without constant accusations of rule bending or breaking or just flat-out cheating.

Pit lane is Haunted, there’s a chill in the air and all around. Kimi has disappeared, he can’t be found. Where’s Kimi? they ask, the silence is deafening with all but one sound, it’s the pitter patter of paws from Hamilton’s hound

He’s sniffing and searching all round the pits, The desert sand’s up his nose causing him sneezing fits. It’s driving him nuts, he’s plum out of his wits, he just wants relax with some kibble n’ bits.

Roscoe is lost there’s no one about. He’s unable to make use of his keen k-9 snout. When suddenly he yelps as he hears someone shout so he turns and he runs cuz it creeped him right out.

As he approaches softly, to avoid floor boards creaking, he hears two ghostly voices in a dark corner speaking. He wonders, “Could they be the cause of the previous shrieking?” as he ducks into the room in the hopes of sneak peeking…

What a surprise, the poor pooch is in shock! Wishing he didn’t have the ears of a bat and the eyes of a hawk. He can’t help but gauk and turns a shade of pale white like an old stick of chalk.

Even worse than the thought of the photos when Max Mosley got caught. Are those of a “French maid” outfit on FIA president Jean Todt. Lucky Todt didn’t bend over or squat, Roscoe ran swiftly back with a lump in his throat that turned into a knot.

The trail he left was far from clean. Unable to erase from his mind what he had seen which was by far the most frightening scene. But we know Todt’s more of a Napoleon type than a wannabe “drag queen” so with that thought in my, I wish you all a Happy F1 Halloween!


From → F1 POEMS, Formula One

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