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‘Twas the night before Christmas – F1 2018

by on December 24, 2018

‘Twas the night before Christmas and Kimi was lit! He crawled in for a nap in his new Sauber cockpit.

Niki’s stockings were hanging from the Mercedes Garage ceiling. They were bright red and furry and surprisingly appealing.

Ross Brawn was nestled, all snug in his bed. Jean Todt slipped into his onesie, coloured cranberry red.

When from the paddock, arose such a clatter, Charlie sprang from his chair to see what was the matter.

Away from that button and straight out the door, he ran so quick, his feet skimmed off the floor.

Beside Fake Charlie he stood stood, in complete disbelief.
Staring at a buck-naked Santa, barring a frozen fig leaf

 

 

The moon shone off his belly, giving off a warm glow, giving luster to the fresh fluffy, new-fallen snow

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,And he laughed when they saw him, in spite of himself;

A wink of his eye, and a twist of his head, exposing all four of his cheeks, which were Ferrari red.

Matteo mumbled something about compliance and risk, while he ran from the Comms office, at a pace which was brisk.

He led Santa inside, from the stark wintry cold, As they all laughed hysterically and uncontrolled

What happened to you? Asked Brundle inquisitively. Santa timidly grinned and responded apprehensively.

It turns out he had had, a few cocktails too many. His memory was blurred after drink number twenty

He needed something to wear and a lift back home, before circling the globe from Shanghai to Rome

There are gifts to pick up and deliver, he sternly pronounced. Toto issued team orders, as soon as this was announced.

Luke Smith’s coffee, kept all focused and warm. While Buxton checked weather for the forecasted snow storm.

Jason Swales found something for Santa to wear. While Bernd warmed up his pace car, so Santa arrived with some flair

Back home, safe and sound, in the frosty North Pole. He readied his reindeer, with a warm soup bowl.

He exclaimed, while hungover with a touch of frostbite…

“Merry Christmas F1, and to all a good night!”

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